HATS

Hats.
Copyright


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Don’t you love the symmetry of the whole creation? The way the felt wraps itself round the head, the organdy wings, the chiffon roses on one side? And to cap it all, no pun intended, the asymmetry of the bow and feathers in muted diamante. I thought Aretha looked absolutely fabulous at the Inauguration. She really put a feather in the milliner’s cap to use an appropriate turn of phrase.
Millinery is a dying art. There are only a few accomplished hat makers in the whole of the USA. One big market is among black ladies attending church who vie with each other every Sunday. The congregation always swells on Easter Sunday and not just because Christ has risen. You have never seen such magnificence of color, foliage, and extravaganza. These creations glow in brilliant colors atop wonderful clothes.
I am sure God is pleased with the display. I’m positive He’s into hats. After all He created flowers, didn’t He? I think instinctively He knew about fashion. Well, look at angel wings, swirling draperies, haloes. The Pearly Gates are nothing but entrances to runways in a fashion show. I bet He loved those wimples of the Middle Ages and I would bet again that His favorite person is not the Beloved Disciple John anymore but Alexander McQueen followed closely by Vivienne Westwood. I'd stake my Hermes cloche that in God’s private art gallery pride of place is given to those Cranach nudes wearing nothing but wispy transparent silk and all wearing dazzling triumphs of millinery.
A hat crowns it all; it complements the original creation. The one mistake God made was not to give Eve a hat. If she’d had one, she would have ignored that serpent and we would not be in the pickle we’re in today. THE END

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